For quite a awhile on my spiritual journey I was very quiet about it. I never spoke about where my beliefs leaned. I did not want to offend or disturb those around me with my non-christian ways. In the beginning of my path I still had lots of religious friends and did not want to loose them. Well over the years they have dropped off as I have shed skins and shed the weight of caring if they were disturbed by my spiritual path. If they were true friends they would still be around right? I have grieved the losses, but have celebrated my growth.
I spent the first 6 years of my path very solitary. I did not seek out other pagans or witches. I slowly began learning about different pagan paths and bits about different pantheons of deities. I shied away from deity because I did not want to be “controlled” by an outside source. I wanted to be me, solitary and strong, making my own choices. I had been told what to do so much in my life that I was quite frankly a pissed of woman with a lot of parental issues. I did not want an other Mother or Father thank you very much.
After a while though I began to truly learn about archetypes and the power behind them. My study of the tarot was a major facilitating factor that schooled me in this. Archetypes, to me, are symbols and flags for our minds and spirits to follow or embrace. In the tarot we have a huge array of archetypes to choose from. Some of my favourites are the queens from the courts, the Empress and High Priestess. These strong feminine figures have helped me to find my own strength and confidence.
A couple of years ago another archetype came into my life unexpectedly. I was not searching for them, they randomly came to my view while scrolling through Facebook one day. It was a post about a Goddess named Epona. I clicked on the post to read more and was drawn to her like a moth to flame. She sounded like a very interesting individual and I wanted to learn more. I learned very quickly that there is very little known of her anymore. She is a very ancient goddess, one of the oldest as far as I can learn, in the Celtic pantheon. There are some people who believe she is connected with Rihannion and Macha of the Morrigan. I can see the similarities and how this can be true. There is no definite way to prove this though as myth and legend change and morph over the centuries.
She is a fascinating figure. She is a protector of animals especially horses and dogs, a guide to the underworld, one who helps you achieve your goals, dream magic is strong with her, a mother, a creator and she is a warrior. I enjoyed getting to know this goddess on paper and decided that she was an archetype I wanted to work with. To be honest…I was a bit scared to approach her.
Why? Because for one I do not believe in personified deity. I believe these archetypes and deities are flowing living energies within us. So if I was going to work with this energy I was going to need to dive within myself deeper then I had before. I was going to have to start doing shadow work on a grander scale. I had already been working with my shadow but this was taking it to the next level.
I began slowly. I started doing ritual dedicated to Epona. I would give offerings and decorated my alter in a way that would be pleasing to her. in everyday life I would ask… What would Epona do? LOL. Yeah kinda hokey but hey it helped me to take those steps forward on my personal path. Never be afraid to do what works for you. 😀 I had decided to give it about a year to see how things developed with this Goddess energy. One day I was doing a meditation where I was wanting to meet Epona and talk with her. I was in the middle of the meditation calling to Epona gently and respectfully. Well,let me tell you, I got the surprise of my life. I will not go in to all the details but Epona showed herself to me. I felt that powerful energy and knew then I was on the right path.
Epona’s energy has been a beautiful presence in my life. The last few years have shown me incredible changes. I am braver, calmer, more determined then I have ever been. Epona’s presence has taught me to fight and not give up because something is difficult. She has been a loving energy that has helped me to learn how to love myself. I am so thankful for this incredible archetype that is within me. I look forward to learning more and becoming more authentically me.
We all have this in us. If we choose to access it we will find landscapes to our souls we never knew we had. If you are wanting to be a better communicator, research and embrace the energies of a great orator. If you want to be a better craftsman do the same. We all have these amazing pieces of ourselves that we don’t access because we are not sure how or are afraid.
Don’t be afraid!
Be the Kick Ass person you were meant to be!
To See The iWonder Sisters Blog go here! Keeping My Spiritual Practice Alive.