Rejection Shadows: How To Deal…

Rejection is a feeling I have lived with very intimately over the years. It has been a close companion from childhood so I believe myself to be pretty well versed in it’s personality.

I have had a recent experience where my shadows of rejection came to play quite strongly. Which is what gave me the push to write this. This situation caused me to look deeply at my heart.

I needed to look at why I was feeling a certain way about what had been proposed to me. Why was I feeling scared? Unworthy? Protective of myself? Desperately wanting to put up walls?

I am proud of myself because I allowed myself to talk to those who are important to me. Told them how I was feeling. They reassured me with love and friendship. I worked through my feelings and came out the other side having learnt something about myself.

The fact is I need still need to deal with my shadows connected to rejection. I think we all do. Have you ever not did something or hid a piece of yourself because of fear of being shamed or rejected? If your answer is yes…and I think it is…keep reading.

I want to share with you some of the ways my rejection shadows manifest…

They show up in a feeling of lack…a lack of..

feeling worthy to be who and what I am
confidence in my abilities.
self-love…caring about myself
the ability to accept affection.

These are all quite powerful shadows to fight individually…it can be a blood bath with all four to battle.

In my experience we can’t do battle with all four at once. When I say that…I mean that we we need to pick our daily battles and choose what we are going to work on that day…we can’t do it all everyday. Our brains would turn into soup if we tried.

You can perform self care and maintenance…but to really deal with a deep and intimate shadow, one must take it on individually.

Here are some steps I take when working through an issue that crops up in my life…

I acknowledge the issue.

I do not ignore it. I look at it. I examine it. I ask some questions to investigate it like…

How is this shadow/scar/trauma making me feel right now?

What triggered it?

Where are my thoughts right now?

Can I engage with these emotions and thoughts at this time? No…shelve it for later…
yes, sit down and process the issue.

2) I make a concerted effort to keep myself feeling loved.

This can be extremely hard, but it can be done. Remembering to be gentle and taking small steps in important. We can not expect ourselves to process overnight…and healing takes even longer.

3) I stay brave.

I might be scared, shamed or feeling I lack the intelligence to deal with a particular issue…but I keep going. I do my best not to crawl under a rock when I am called to deal with a shadow that knocks at my psyche. Please don’t feel bad if you hide…I still do that all the time…but I do my damned best not to. There are days we just can’t deal and that is OK…but stand up the next day and say…”I’m going to kick some ass!”

So lets bring this back to rejection…

What is rejection?

It is that feeling of not feeling in, being shunned, not accepted within the group you maybe associated with.

How can rejection make us act?

Rejection can make us act out or react internally in a way that shuts down those around us or ourselves.

Now you might ask…Well how can we work with this knowledge?

When we feel ourselves being triggered or pulled into the feelings of being rejected there are a few things we can do.

First) Staying balanced in our emotions. We can remind ourselves that not everything or everyone is hating/shaming or looking down on us.

Second) See the situation in it’s entirety. We all have a tendency to see from one perspective…ours. Our eyes see things coloured by our experiences and emotions brought on by them. Making an effort to expand our view and see the world from different vantage points will greatly help us to reduce the feelings of rejection.

Third) Endeavour to learn the difference between loving criticism and invasive rejection.

Those of us who struggle with rejection issues can be hyper sensitive to criticism, even when it is given with care and our best interests in mind. We will reject this loving show of support because we are triggered and see it as invasive rejection.

Invasive rejection is where we experience an environment of shame/dismissal and feeling of invisibility. It is an environment we see as permanent and without escape. Those of us with rejection shadows can a lot of the time see the world as this environment…and this follows us everywhere. Especially if one has grown up in a family situation where rejection was an everyday occurrence.

and Forth) Don’t hide. No matter what…grab your courage by the balls. It will be fucking scary…but go forth anyway. When you do this, remind yourself that acceptance from others can be fleeting, acceptance of self brings life. When we accept ourselves we see more acceptance in the world around us.

So my Dears, Lets love ourselves and start accepting ourselves for who we are. Love yourself into being the truly wonderful creature you want to be. You have every right to expand and be who are at your core.

I want to give you this gift, It is a tarot spread to encourage acceptance of self. Please let me know if you try it our and how it worked for you. 😀

Rejection Shadows Spread

I leave you all with my love and acceptance of who you are. May you be blessed with love and immense amounts of life and light.

Bree

The Power of I Am.

Welcome to the first annual International Tarot Day Blog Hop!

The card that I was assigned is the Magician. I absolutely adore the Magician for many reasons. To my mind he is such a character of strength, creativity, personal power, confidence and passion.

The words that describe this dynamic archetype are I Am. The statement I AM is the most powerful in the human language. I consider them the most beautiful.

I Am is a vocalization of our belief in ourselves. The confidence we have within. How does this thought make you feel? Excited? Apprehensive?

It used to scare the hell out of me to be honest. I grew up being torn down and these words sought to heal that. For a long time I ran away from this wonderful energy…but I no longer do. I embrace it and am learning so much about myself in the process.

Do you want to feel like a more confident individual? Do you want to manifest more positive change in your life?

You can. We all are able to access that magician within.

Here is an exercise to help you connect with your inner magician.

_________________________________________

Take a mirror and place yourself somewhere comfortable. Or just stand in front of a convenient mirror.

Look at yourself. Look at all your uniqueness. Greet your soul by looking into your eyes and seeing what is within.

Speak the words I AM. Say them to yourself and absorb the energy inherent in those words.

If you like you can add to the statement and create some manifestation magic. You can say things like…

I am creative.

I am healing.

I am loved.

I am confident.

Once you do this, examine how you feel. Has this brought you focus? Self compassion?

This exercise is meant to build you up, not tear down. If you feel torn down in anyway, reevaluate the statement you chose to use, or just step back to I AM. You can build up to more in the future.
_________________________________________________

I was inspired to write a bit of prose to go wth this blog. I hope you will enjoy it and may it bring you a small piece of inspiration.

I speak.

I am,

Birthing reality.

I face darkness.

I am,

Healing scars. Blood releases the pain.

I seek outcomes.

I am,

The master student. Confident yet questioning.

I am built of tinder.

I am,

a flash of ignition that brings passionate action.

I am.

I am.

I am.

 

May you all blessed!

Bree

 

To see the next blog in this hop… Please visit Goran at 78 Midnight Howls… here is the link!   —–>  78midnighthowls

Weekly Reading for May 7th to 13th

We have a wonderfully motivational reading this week guys. We have the Page of Pentacles, The Tower and the Page of Wands. Lots of deep thought, change and moving towards your goals type of energies this week!

I used the Druidcraft Tarot this week.

Much love! 

Bree

May 2017 Cartoscopes!

Weekly ReadingFor April 9th to 15th.-12

Hello Star Monkeys!!

Here is your May Cartoscopes. I decided to do these live on Periscope this month. So this is a recording of that broadcast. 😀 

I had so much fun doing the cartoscopes this way. I believe I will do them this from now on. 

I wish you all a beautiful May! 

Bree

Aries

Taurus

Gemini

Cancer

Leo

Virgo

Libra

Scorpio

Sagittarius

Capricorn

Aquarius

Pisces

Nym’s Tips for Weathering The Shit-Storms Of life!

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Storms often bring up imagery of difficult times in ones life. Picture credit to Unknown. 

We all go through hard times…Shit-Storms we sometimes call them. We can feel pretty defeated and frustrated when these times hit us. I personally have just come out of one of these, so I popped on Periscope today to discuss my ideas and tips for weathering these storms. 

Rewrite Your Code Tarot Spread

Every single one of us has internal programming. Be it from childhood upbringing or from life experiences. It is hard to not become reactionary instead of responsive to our environments. This is perfectly normal.

The thing is…We don’t have to sit there, shrug our shoulders, and say “Well that is just how I am.”.

We can do something about those reactions and default behaviours we have. If they cause us to feel like we just don’t measure up, increase our anxiety or tell us we can not go beyond what we are in that moment…then this tarot spread is a good one to try out.

We all can rewrite our code, we sometimes need a little advice, wisdom or a nudge to do so…

I hope this spread will bring you what you need to rewrite your code.

 

1_ Where does this code in my programming come from? 2_ What actions are presenting in me as a result of this programming?3_ what actions can I take to counter this programming? 4_ How c

Eight of Swords from the Wild Unknown Tarot

 

1_ Where does this code in my programming come from? 2_ What actions are presenting in me as a result of this programming?3_ what actions can I take to counter this programming? 4_ How c

Rewrite Your Code Tarot Spread

General Tarot Card Meditation

This Meditation takes you into your consciously chosen tarot or oracle card. You will enter the world of the card and explore and receive what guidance the universe has to share with you.

This is my personal process for experiencing a tarot or oracle card through meditation. I hope it brings you some insight and enjoyment.

Blessing to you all!

Bree